Having a DJ mentor can be great, but what happens when you get offered their gigs?
Digital DJ Tips reader DJ Godspeed (name changed by request) writes: “Seven months ago, I had just bought my first controller and was pretty new to the DJ scene. I had previous knowledge of beatmatching and stuff because I had been playing with Virtual DJ but I still considered myself a novice.
“Anyway, I was so passionate about DJing that I read stuff, watched videos, listened to mixes and practised as much as I could. I also had a DJ mentor who helped me get a grip really fast.
“I soon found out that I wasn’t content with DJing alone so I began learning about musical keys and stuff. I began to try remixing and mashups. All this I did on my own, because my mentor doesn’t care much about that. Today I’ve become quite good and people are starting to love me a lot.
“The problem is, I feel like I’m ‘stealing’ my mentor’s spot. He’s been in the game a long time but in this short time, people are beginning to like me more, thanks to my remixing / mashups, live mashups etc.
When I went to the party, people were asking me why I wasn’t DJing…
“He’s a cool guy but sometimes I wonder if I’m becoming too much like competition for him. I’ve refused a gig in the past so that he could have it, but when I went to the party, people were asking me why I wasn’t DJing.
“I feel like I should step back a bit since he was the one who helped me when I was just starting, plus he’s more experienced. I don’t want to spoil our friendship. Is it OK to feel this way? What would you do?”
Digital DJ Tips says:
It’s a hard one. Can you take bookings where you both play together?
I’ve been in the situation where I DJ with a partner, and then we get offered gigs separately – we were cool about that, as we had different styles and I actually DJed out a lot more (out of choice) than he did, but every situation is different.
I’d like to throw this one over to the readers….
Have you been in a similar situation to DJ Godspeed? What did you do? Did the situation get resolved, or were there lasting issues? What would your advice be?
Now go to:
Should I Let My Friend’s Brother DJ With Me?
5 Reasons Why DJs Should Make Mash-ups (Not Mixtapes) To Get Bookings
7 Big Mistakes I Made At My First DJ Gig (And Why It Was Still Great Fun)
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Tags: beginner digital dj tips, DJ etiquette, dj mentors
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Wow, first off I applaude your decency and caring for your mentor. That really shows character. However, your ambition and the fact that you are willing to put extra effort in becoming a better then average DJ, shouldn’t become a negative energy. It should get rewarded! If your mentor doesn’t care for the extra work and get in touch with ‘modern DJ’ing’, is his own responsibility.
What you could do is talk to the man. Tell him how you feel and that you want to go ahead and make the best out of your career that you can. Tough love!
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[ link ]This happened to me once before. I simply put more effort and time into DJing than my original mentor, so became more skilled and ended up getting his gigs. Eventually, and most awkwardly, I started running my own events, and had to refuse him slots as he simply wasn’t practicing enough and lacked the necessary skill.
I agonized about it at the time, but eventually decided it was more important to advance my career than to worry about his bruised ego. If I had chosen to hold myself back in order to avoid upsetting him I would be extremely resentful about it now.
If you’re getting gigs it’s because you’ve earned it. Don’t get someone else’s ego get in the way of you taking what you’ve earned.
[ link ]Very decent of you to consider your mentor. But it looks like the student has overtaken the master, and time to spread your wings. It sounds like he is very hapy DJing at the level he is, and will continue to get gigs suited to his style. It sounds like you are ready to move onto a more active level of DJing, and ultimately you’ll probably be working on different types of gigs anyway, and any not suited to your style you can pass onto him. If one day you end up in front a crowd of thousands in Ibiza, he can only be proud and say – I trained that guy, look at him now. As a mentor this is where we get our real satisfaction, in passing on and seeing the skill improved.
[ link ]Maybe he´s good at aiming and looking for new talents. 3 years ago, i had the honour of teaching digital dj´ing techniques to one of the strongest upcoming female dj´s on my country. She certainly has talent and a image that really helps her to achieve (she´s gorgeous) the top spot on every party-gig.Well in the beggining i´ve sure felt envy but then a bunch of others amateur dj´s turned to me, to learn the “same i´ve teached to the golden girl”. So i learned (as a “Mentor”) that maybe my job and my oportunity was really to bring up new talents. So i´ve dedicated myself to teaching, and hunting new talents and obviusly, try to obtain a “royalty” for every gig they get. (kind of producer or booking agent, but also as technical advisor). Look, your experience as a mentor will always serve as a “moral support” to them, and also there are cases when my “protegeé” called me in the middle of a gig to obtain technical support or to debug some obscure driver problem on their setup, etc. So as a “mentor” standpoint, i can foretell the advantages of being the “mentor” of various dj´s. Of course i can always ask for a guest spot on one of my most proficient student´s gig. So is not that bad offering him a guest spot and announcing him as your mentor. or to propose him to give him royalties from your gigs
[ link ]I agree with the part that Eric said that you should come out clean and tell him what’s on your mind, Let him know what people are saying about your work and all the requests you are receiving but that your intention is not to take his clientele but you wanted him to know. Wait and see what his reaction is, if he is a true professional and a smart one like Freddy,he will understand and will continue to support you in any way he can and the good thing is that he will trust you for the rest of his life because you were honest.
[ link ]Now if he doesn’t like the idea then you must step back and try to find your own clientele, yes it will be hard but being that you are putting 100% to Dj the process will be faster.
There is that saying “never burn your bridges” because you never know when you are going to need them. By doing what I suggest not only you will feel good about yourself because you did the right thing but you will start to be respected as a Dj and as a professional otherwise you will be just like the other thousands of Dj’s that back stab other Djs then you will be on other people’s mouth and being known as the Dj that steals clients.
Be Different, Be Professional and you will make it to the top in no time.
I dunno. If I was mentoring a kid and he ran into thIs situation, I’d want him to feel comfortable to talk to me about it and see where I stand. If I’m a true friend, then I’d be happy you’re going places. If I’m a swine, then I’d try to hold you back.
Now if I made a living as a resident in a club and suddenly the owner privately offers you my spot for less money, I’d expect you to decline…knowing the owner is trying to use you to undercut me.
Frankly, I also think if you’re more willing to take gigs I don’t want to, then I would not get irked. So perhaps your mentor is happy playing a normal bar spot, but you’re getting offers to play guest spots all over. He might not have the desire to run around all over the place while you do.
Best way to not be a backstabber is simply to talk frankly with the friend when you have these worries. A real friend won’t hold you back.
[ link ]Try get gigs at venues and areas he doesn’t DJ at, make sure your charging the same as him if not more as undercutting to win gigs is unacceptable.
Remember when your a pro and need the coin, some twat might go out for $50 and fu*k you up.
[ link ]First, I’m gonna start with a simple fact:
You can’t reach the top DJing alone.
Now, as you pointed out, your mentor has no interest in doing the other work necessary to reach the higher echelons of the club DJ circuit. Therefore, why should you hold yourself back when you’re clearly the one working hard to better yourself?
[ link ]Hats off Dj Godspeed !! it really shows character of a person…and also that you never forget where you come from and who helped you reach the level you currently are at. I am sure your mentor would be proud of you..!! I also feel you should talk to him and express openly how you feel. Like Mike said…when you playing at a big gig later in your life…he would be proud to say that he taught you. Wish you all the best for future…we sure hope you do great !!!
[ link ]As long as you are getting gigs for your skill you can always say yes. But be honest about it. If he is after the same gig you should tell him that you have gotten it so he knows. Then you can tell him why you got it and offer to actually teach him a thing or two. Its called feedback, and if you tell him first 1 or 2 good things he does and then tell him 1 or 2 things he can improve then he will listen. But you have to be honest and understand that if he gets better he can again become popular. Hopefully there are more gigs so both of you can grow and play so you both get booked. Eventually even as a team for the party so its even more popular and if you need a backup you can always recomend each other. So use each others strengts and improve your weaknesses and bth of you will have a good friendship and reputation. (ive been there and done that…it works!!)
[ link ]DJs are a community. There is an understanding of the hustle, but also some sort of code of ethics. Talk to your mentor and make sure it’s ok before you steal spots. The time will come when you’ll want to the community behind your back, but you won’t get it if you’re sneaky to the ones closest to you.
[ link ]if i were youu ! i would tell him exact words that you tell us , even if its harsh , but a true friend will understand , who knows maybe he will get motivated put that extra work to learn like you more and maybe work together and be both better .
anything else ! is time wasting and mind energy consuming
if he respond negativly , just say thanks for everything he teach you and you will never forget that , and DONT
[ link ]and leave him
respect….one word. heed. there will be other gigs. don’t bite the hand that taught u how to feed. trust me.
[ link ]He isn’t biting anyone’s hand. In fact – and if this mentor is half-human, he will notice – he is being incredibly overconscientious and thoughtful about this. Another commenter said to just not undercut him and I think that’s the best advice. If you start acting shady, it will look shady, if you tell him that it makes you uncomfortable, the reasonable response from him would be to feel proud that he gave you wings. If he is salty about it, then that’s his problem.
Sounds like you have morals and character, don’t lose that if you make it big. Lemmi from Motorhead “Be careful to not to fuck people on the way up, because you will meet them on the way down”, that’s good advice. I’m very happy for you that you are seeing success, good luck to you in the future.
[ link ]Yeah, I have been in this situation. Just get your own gigs. Don’t try to undercut your mentor. I don’t think it would feel good to you in the long run regardless of who won the competition for the same gig. Just like there are friends that think you are the best….some will think he is the best. Therefore, get your own gigs…,your mentor can’t hate on that.
[ link ]It’s a tough call either way…..On one hand, you want to be loyal to the person that helped you put your foot in the door but on the other hand, you have to make sure that your best interest is being looked after. You need to weigh the pros and cons and make a decision that will balance your friendship and your market value. Being too loyal can diminish or marginalize your self worth.
[ link ]I wanna hear this guy’s mixes. I know he’s not comfortable outing himself at the moment but I hope he eventually does. Nice to hear new talent that’s kicking ass ya know?
[ link ]Yeah, I have been in this situation. Just get your own gigs. Don’t try to undercut your mentor. I don’t think it would feel good to you in the long run regardless of who won the competition for the same gig. Just like there are friends that think you are the best….some will think he is the best.
[ link ]Yow… I say level with him. I am one that believes in leveling with your people. Tell him everything you told us… once the situation has been explained…. if he still wants to do things his way (which most older djs do) then get that paper my dude!!! Your shine should not be turned down because he does not want to turn his up. If you hustled hard, evolved and adapted and he did not….. it is not your fault that he will go the way of the dodo bird ……it is his!
DO You and get that paper Fambo!
[ link ]Looks the mentor has become the student… why not work as a team, if you guys a are friends then it should be fun right ?
Then when you are actually DJ’ing and he doesn’t lift his game to your level then my bet is he will start turning the gigs down himself ^^
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